- He made me feel old by commenting on my age. At 34, I haven't even reached the "advanced maternal age" designation. All sorts of women have babies at 34, and many even older than that.
- He certainly wasn't willing to listen to my concerns, nor was he familiar enough with my chart to actually know what our issues are.
- He chose to say I had "challenged ovulation", even though on paper my tests have all come back perfectly fine and I do ovulate regularly. Our "sperm issues" are minimal and even the fertility specialist said plenty of men with known morphology issues go on to father perfectly normal healthy children. So, why the resistance?
- The whole science vs progesterone issue...progesterone doesn't hurt anything. You can't overdose on it, it's not a controlled substance and the fertility specialist (who belongs to the same hospital system and who my OB said he works closely with) regularly prescribes it to their patients. Again, why the resistance?
- The rude and unnecessary comment regarding him being stuck on weekends doing IUI procedures was completely uncalled for. I wasn't asking him to do an IUI on me. In fact, it was exactly what I was trying to avoid entirely.
- His follow-up comment about not wanting to see me until I'm pregnant? Who says stuff like that to a woman who has had multiple miscarriages?
Wednesday, September 26, 2012
We've all heard it before. "If it's meant to be", "Everything happens for a reason", "It'll happen when it's the right time", "God has a plan". Generally when I hear those statements uttered (which is quite frequently) I roll my eyes, nod my head or give a simple "yeah" response. But I don't actually believe it. My faith has been tested over the last year, many times. My spiritual faith, faith in myself, my body, and faith in my doctors have all been questioned and doubted. Who do I trust? What do I believe in? Can I keep doing this?
It was truly awful. I only wished my husband had been along to witness his behavior.
So maybe, just maybe, this was meant to happen. Maybe somewhere along the way I would have found him to be intolerable or the wrong fit for us if I had ended up with a successful pregnancy and would have been "stuck" with him. Tom didn't like him from his first experience at my HSG with him, said he was a jerk. He absolutely traumatized me.